STUPID HOMEWORK IS STUPID.

FORMSPRING ME:

http://www.formspring.me/foralovesuicide

HEARTS.HEARTS.HEARTS.

OR U GO IN MY BITCH BOOK. FOR BAD REASONS.

OVERWHELMED. TOO MANY SONGS THAT I CAN RELATE TO SO BADLY RIGHT NOW. WHY. NOW I HAVE TO ASSOCIATE ALL THESE SONGS WITH BAD FEELINGS D: THAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD EVER COME BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR IPOD.

NEW ACCOUNT. NEW BACKGROUND. YAY.

SOO IT TOOK, believe it or not, quite a lot of bloody time to transfer this fucking blog from one fucking account to the other. Jeeeeezuz Google. couldn't have made it any harder could you have?

so i hate th new blogger layout so i reverted back to the old one because im...idk what.

hows the new background hmm????

created a new YouTube account too. probably my 6th one. thinking of uploading a video onto it. the last i ever uploaded was a um...Aushem one.......will never speak of those ever again. *ahem*

have had a really really bad sore throat for the lat 3 days. I think i'm dieing. dying?

its like extremely sore...and different from the usual sore throats i get. mum says its nothing. i hope so...or else i guess that means no VCE for me? O.o

So i was meant to wake up at 7am today. My alarm went off. I hit sleep. Went off again. Hit sleep. Got a text. Woke up. 3:15pm. oh boy.

how the fuck am i going to adjust back my time for school. :(

IM BACK BITCHAAASSSS.

yer so right before my final year of school. kinda a bad start. dont get the homework and everyone else probably does. i feel so stupid.

i wanna know if it's just me who googles the saddest and most random shit everrrrr.


ssoooo summer holidays. just consists of the above and finding songs that i can relate to because im a sad sad sad bitch seeking attention because mummy and daddy don't gimme enuff of it. so ima go create a fake account on eharmony and cry with some other sad person.

pee-pole. HA. people. im too funny. 

okay another thing to talk about. when people beg u over and over again to do something and u don't want to but then u finally cave in and then for some reason they dont bother anymore. okay example time. hmmmm. alright. this is a shitty example. wait. why the fuck is alright not a word. al right? all right. alrite. huh? soooo say person A wants person B to buy candy from them and they nag them about it and complain that they never buy it and why not balh blah blah and then finally one day person B decides to and then person A is really happy and they keep buying and selling for about 2 weeks or something and then person A stops selling it to them because they got bored or they already got what they wanted like moolah.

i just realised. i only ever remember the very beginning and the very end of each year. and never what goes on between. even though all the shit that goes on between is what makes me say "oh this year wasn't as shit as the last"

so funeral playlist. needs to be completed soon. bye!

CANT THINK OF A FUCKING TITLE BUT I BET THE REST OF THE STATE COULD.

how do you know when things have gotten pretty bad? no...not even that...like...near death terrible?

when you find yourself rocking back and forth in the corner of a room crying to taylor swift songs.

what have i been doing all day?

that.

what do i need to be doing?

homework.

why do i need to be doing that?

because daddy gonna take away my phone and the internet for a month.

and why is that?

ima be catchin some yellow.

ALL THEM PRETTY PEOPLE SMOKE.

I would kill to look like her.

Freja:

and i kinda like. want that jacket.

MON FRANCAIS EST MAUVAIS

Je ne sais pas ou je peux trouver les accents: graves, aigus, circonflexes, et cedilles ici....eh, j'abandonne.

OKAY. My Immaterial Wishlist for Noel et le Nouvel An!

• intelligence
• some sort of useful skill. money making skill baha. and please god. not flexibility nor strength for pole dancing. they do not count.
• joliesse!
• je souhaite que quelqu'un en particulier viendrait a Melbourne.
• le courage (guts) voir ladite personne. 
• la bonne sante
• je veux ameliorer mon francais
• j'ai besoin d'un ATAR de 95 ou plus.
• Peut-etre que je peux grandir un autre deux centimetres plus grands? je n'ai pas grandi depuis deux ans, malheureusement :(

Ce post de blog n'a pas ete cense etre en francais. oops. En outre, la plupart de ce post est incorrecte non plus.

WHY I HATE CHRISTMAS

So I haven't always hated Christmas; in fact, it was my favourite time of year. However, since probably 2009, it's become an event full of frustration and tears (of sadness) and hate for me.

I'm not quite sure where to begin with this. Okay maybe, I'll start with the fact that I'm asian, and since more asian relatives have landed that asses onto this island, christmas spirit and tradition have just become blah.
food sucks, music sucks, people suck, gift giving sucks, atmosphere sucks. there was nothing christmas-y at all about last year's christmas. and the one before that. i've absolutely hated both of them. they're just like "okay let's throw in some ham and cook any white person's meal we can. there you go. here's your christmas."

Now what prompted me to write this blog post was something that happened about 20 minutes ago. So i've been feeling kind of guilty lately since my sister pointed out that i never really do much for her birthday or christmas and she always puts in effort and time to make me something. well, im sorry that i'm not exactly creative. and usually, the things i make end up in the trash anyway. so let's face it, i'm helping to save the environment. sort of.
I don't know if i've ever been this broke around Christmas before. I guess I've just never had such a need for money whilst simultaneously possessing next to nothing. So this year, my sister and I decided to give each other a christmas wishlist and both of us are to pick one or more items off that list to get for each other. So the thing I wanted was around $40 which, in comparison to the other $98 option, is pretty affordable. Then I picked some stuff she's been wanting for ages off of her list and decided that I would actually be nice this year and wrote up a list of other stuff I would throw in as well to surprise her and also rid me of the "worst sister of the year" award that my family has given me. Being the broke ass bitch I am, I added the stuff up and it pretty much uses up all the money I made selling my school books (money which is also needed to buy my next year's books) and i was all cool with that and was in fact pretty excited about going out to get those things for her and perhaps even making her happy on christmas this year.
BUT. she goes off and asks mum about when she can get driven to chaddy to buy some shit and one thing led to another and soon mum comes home and she asks me why I'm using my sister to buy expensive shit for me. then she and my sister go off about how what i'm getting her better be worth the same amount and my mum's like "i'm gonna make sure that you two have the same budget" blah blah blah. what. the. fuck. like since when was christmas all about comparing the price of presents.
so what's really aggravating me is that now, she's (and my mother) expecting me to buy fuck loads for her and make sure it adds up to what she's going to pay. UM. REALLY? I was going to fucking get you all that shit anyway and now i'm considering otherwise you fucking brat.

PLASTIC SURGERY

what is everyone's deal about being so against it? no need for the hate.
honestly i think it's amazing how someone can become a different person -not just physically, but also personality-wise- just by going under the knife.
i mean, if it makes someone feel better and more confident about themselves, then why the fuck not?
im gonna guess that the majority of anti-plastic surgery people are:
- too poor to afford it
- have nothing wrong with the way they look
- want to keep the ugly, ugly, so as to make themselves feel better

have i considered it for when im old enough? yeah.
will i go through with it? if hairdressing makes me enough moolah $$$
why would i go through with it? because if no one likes me now and everyone thinks im freakin hideous then it wouldn't hurt right? couldnt possibly get any worse.

NATURAL BEAUTY IS HIDEOUS

those who are fucked up bs that natural beauty is better than fake beauty. like. are you fucking blind? maybe i'm just speaking for myself here which, most of the time i am, but there is no fucking way that that is true.
you know why?

because ugly people never get anywhere in life and no one ever loves them or cares about them or is ever genuinely nice to them. and it's worse if you're brain doesnt function as well as others'. yay for a 50% in methods and a 45% in englang and no sciences. so asian.
pretty people get everything. everything. so yah. this is why i hate pretty people. especially pretty and smart people. i fucking envy you people. what the fuck was your mother eating while pregnant with you. i wanna know!

so IMO there are certain types of fake bitches that i think look pretty good. the only things i really cant stand are horrible fake tans and bleached hair. but take someone who spends hours everyday and $$$ every year making sure they look like Barbie and then compare them to some dipshit who spends less than 1% of their day working on their appearance in order to show off their so-called "natural beauty" that everyone apparently so dearly loves.

it becomes a little game show called "Beauty VS Beasts" where i am obviously in the latter category and always always always, the Beauties will always win.

you don't hear males being all like "daaayyyuumm check out her frizzy greasy hair and her bulbous nose and her double chin and non-existent eyes! i'd tap that."

and when it comes to work. no one is going to want to hire you to sell their products if you're constantly looking like some pubescent jelly-thighed gorilla.

Plans

I can't figure out whether having a plan is a good thing or not. It either works out, or creates false hope.
day plan
study plan?
life plan

day plans only sometimes work out. of you're lucky.
study plans...hahahahahano.
life plans are probably one of the main causes of depression and emos.

well. my life plan is crazy..=failure=self harm=suicide=death.
so basically. my life plan=death.

so it's like. by:
21 - moved out
25 - married
27 - better be freakin successful at something
30- kids
35 - 2 kids
40 - better be a fucking rich person
55 - retired

more probable situation:
25 - kicked out of the house
26 - homeless = prostitution
30 - unwanted and jobless
35 - steal a husky
40 - steal a baby
41 - cardboard box house destroyed by storm
42 - arrested
43 - jail
43.1 - raped and slaughtered in prison