CANT THINK OF A FUCKING TITLE BUT I BET THE REST OF THE STATE COULD.

how do you know when things have gotten pretty bad? no...not even that...like...near death terrible?

when you find yourself rocking back and forth in the corner of a room crying to taylor swift songs.

what have i been doing all day?

that.

what do i need to be doing?

homework.

why do i need to be doing that?

because daddy gonna take away my phone and the internet for a month.

and why is that?

ima be catchin some yellow.

ALL THEM PRETTY PEOPLE SMOKE.

I would kill to look like her.

Freja:

and i kinda like. want that jacket.

MON FRANCAIS EST MAUVAIS

Je ne sais pas ou je peux trouver les accents: graves, aigus, circonflexes, et cedilles ici....eh, j'abandonne.

OKAY. My Immaterial Wishlist for Noel et le Nouvel An!

• intelligence
• some sort of useful skill. money making skill baha. and please god. not flexibility nor strength for pole dancing. they do not count.
• joliesse!
• je souhaite que quelqu'un en particulier viendrait a Melbourne.
• le courage (guts) voir ladite personne. 
• la bonne sante
• je veux ameliorer mon francais
• j'ai besoin d'un ATAR de 95 ou plus.
• Peut-etre que je peux grandir un autre deux centimetres plus grands? je n'ai pas grandi depuis deux ans, malheureusement :(

Ce post de blog n'a pas ete cense etre en francais. oops. En outre, la plupart de ce post est incorrecte non plus.

WHY I HATE CHRISTMAS

So I haven't always hated Christmas; in fact, it was my favourite time of year. However, since probably 2009, it's become an event full of frustration and tears (of sadness) and hate for me.

I'm not quite sure where to begin with this. Okay maybe, I'll start with the fact that I'm asian, and since more asian relatives have landed that asses onto this island, christmas spirit and tradition have just become blah.
food sucks, music sucks, people suck, gift giving sucks, atmosphere sucks. there was nothing christmas-y at all about last year's christmas. and the one before that. i've absolutely hated both of them. they're just like "okay let's throw in some ham and cook any white person's meal we can. there you go. here's your christmas."

Now what prompted me to write this blog post was something that happened about 20 minutes ago. So i've been feeling kind of guilty lately since my sister pointed out that i never really do much for her birthday or christmas and she always puts in effort and time to make me something. well, im sorry that i'm not exactly creative. and usually, the things i make end up in the trash anyway. so let's face it, i'm helping to save the environment. sort of.
I don't know if i've ever been this broke around Christmas before. I guess I've just never had such a need for money whilst simultaneously possessing next to nothing. So this year, my sister and I decided to give each other a christmas wishlist and both of us are to pick one or more items off that list to get for each other. So the thing I wanted was around $40 which, in comparison to the other $98 option, is pretty affordable. Then I picked some stuff she's been wanting for ages off of her list and decided that I would actually be nice this year and wrote up a list of other stuff I would throw in as well to surprise her and also rid me of the "worst sister of the year" award that my family has given me. Being the broke ass bitch I am, I added the stuff up and it pretty much uses up all the money I made selling my school books (money which is also needed to buy my next year's books) and i was all cool with that and was in fact pretty excited about going out to get those things for her and perhaps even making her happy on christmas this year.
BUT. she goes off and asks mum about when she can get driven to chaddy to buy some shit and one thing led to another and soon mum comes home and she asks me why I'm using my sister to buy expensive shit for me. then she and my sister go off about how what i'm getting her better be worth the same amount and my mum's like "i'm gonna make sure that you two have the same budget" blah blah blah. what. the. fuck. like since when was christmas all about comparing the price of presents.
so what's really aggravating me is that now, she's (and my mother) expecting me to buy fuck loads for her and make sure it adds up to what she's going to pay. UM. REALLY? I was going to fucking get you all that shit anyway and now i'm considering otherwise you fucking brat.

PLASTIC SURGERY

what is everyone's deal about being so against it? no need for the hate.
honestly i think it's amazing how someone can become a different person -not just physically, but also personality-wise- just by going under the knife.
i mean, if it makes someone feel better and more confident about themselves, then why the fuck not?
im gonna guess that the majority of anti-plastic surgery people are:
- too poor to afford it
- have nothing wrong with the way they look
- want to keep the ugly, ugly, so as to make themselves feel better

have i considered it for when im old enough? yeah.
will i go through with it? if hairdressing makes me enough moolah $$$
why would i go through with it? because if no one likes me now and everyone thinks im freakin hideous then it wouldn't hurt right? couldnt possibly get any worse.

NATURAL BEAUTY IS HIDEOUS

those who are fucked up bs that natural beauty is better than fake beauty. like. are you fucking blind? maybe i'm just speaking for myself here which, most of the time i am, but there is no fucking way that that is true.
you know why?

because ugly people never get anywhere in life and no one ever loves them or cares about them or is ever genuinely nice to them. and it's worse if you're brain doesnt function as well as others'. yay for a 50% in methods and a 45% in englang and no sciences. so asian.
pretty people get everything. everything. so yah. this is why i hate pretty people. especially pretty and smart people. i fucking envy you people. what the fuck was your mother eating while pregnant with you. i wanna know!

so IMO there are certain types of fake bitches that i think look pretty good. the only things i really cant stand are horrible fake tans and bleached hair. but take someone who spends hours everyday and $$$ every year making sure they look like Barbie and then compare them to some dipshit who spends less than 1% of their day working on their appearance in order to show off their so-called "natural beauty" that everyone apparently so dearly loves.

it becomes a little game show called "Beauty VS Beasts" where i am obviously in the latter category and always always always, the Beauties will always win.

you don't hear males being all like "daaayyyuumm check out her frizzy greasy hair and her bulbous nose and her double chin and non-existent eyes! i'd tap that."

and when it comes to work. no one is going to want to hire you to sell their products if you're constantly looking like some pubescent jelly-thighed gorilla.